Concrete Ghost

Ads on my blog?

2009-05-20T23:49:00.000-07:00

I put ads on my blog, what do you think? Have I sold out? Man, I was really torn over this decision. I wanted to keep my blog free from things like, "the man" and "corporations", but I also wanted to buy some studio monitors. Google promises me an "undisclosed share" of the revenue from these ads, so you guys better start clicking!

I had to agree to not post any of the cool stuff below to get ads on the site:

* Pornography, adult or mature content
* Violent content
* Content related to racial intolerance or advocacy against any individual, group or organisation
* Excessive profanity
* Hacking/cracking content
* Gambling or casino-related content
* Illicit drugs and drug paraphernalia content
* Sales of beer or hard alcohol
* Sales of tobacco or tobacco-related products
* Sales of prescription drugs
* Sales of weapons or ammunition (e.g. firearms, firearm components, fighting knives, stun guns)
* Sales of products that are replicas or imitations of designer goods
* Sales or distribution of coursework or student essays
* Content regarding programs which compensate users for clicking ads or offers, performing searches, surfing websites or reading emails
* Any other content that is illegal, promotes illegal activity or infringes on the legal rights of others

Do you think they will stifle my creativity and/or will oppressive pop-up ads and landing pages give my blog more credibility, like Salon.com? Maybe I can get the Ask the Pilot guy to write something for the site, I'm a big fan of his work. I can pay him an "undisclosed share" of the ad revenue.

I guess my idea for texasholdemtermpapers.com will have to be placed on hold until I can find a place with less restrictive rules. Maybe I'll check out having my site hosted on one of those libertarian seasteads. Do you think this site is laissez-faire? If not, why? Too much regulation? Welfare/Nanny State?

Let me know what you guys think of the ads, they are based on keywords found in my blog text. Follow up question, what keywords do you think i need to put to get the naked American Apparel ads?

Best MySpace Ever!

2009-01-28T20:31:00.001-08:00

Okay, so I found this MySpace after falling down the rabbit hold for about an hour, and it's the best one I've ever seen which is how I came up for the title of this weblog posting, "Best MySpace Ever!"

Anywho, the page in question belongs to someone who is primarily obsessed with Johnny Depp and his portrayal of Capt. Jack Sparrow in Pirates of the Caribbean. This in itself is no accomplishment. The person becomes truly special because their secondary obsession is Rachel Ray. Hmm... This doesn't quite make sense right away, but once you have spent the 45 minutes required to really digest this person's page you will soon realize that your first impression was correct and you wasted a lot of time. But wait! Your time really wasn't wasted. You were just entertained, but you haven't realized it yet. It's a special kind of entertainment, the kind that can only come from giving a clinically insane person the tools to pimp their MySpace.

Swedish Dance Bands, Ahoy!

2008-11-16T11:48:00.000-08:00

Jeremy gave me this link to a website with some awesome pictures of Swedish dance bands, such as the one to your left. There is a frighteningly large amount of these pictures on the site, but they are all worth it. Jeremy points out that the guy in the photo fourth from the top looks like Peter Griffin. I think he's right.

This is slightly better...

2008-11-15T00:54:00.000-08:00

... until you realize that it's people dancing in the Dairy Queen parking lot. I didn't realize that Dormer Plaza is the new spot.

White Center, are you comfortable being represented by this guy?

2008-11-15T00:51:00.000-08:00

I was on YouTube searching for videos that came up for White Center, WA and I found this gem.

You tell 'em Chris...

2008-09-23T22:24:00.000-07:00

Click Here!

Wilco & Fleet Foxes

2008-08-27T21:17:00.000-07:00

Here's a clip of Wilco and Fleet Foxes singing "I Shall Be Released" in Spokane.

#1 Haiku

2008-08-05T19:21:00.000-07:00

Picture polar bears
Like the ones that were on Lost
Now see them fucking

Things I suck at.

2008-07-19T19:35:00.000-07:00

Jams

2008-05-27T22:34:00.000-07:00

Just a quickie, but check out the music player I've added on the right-hand side. These are the only officially approved jams to listen to while reading this site. I will update the list every weekish. If anyone has suggestions, leave 'em in the comments and I'll see what I can do.

You won't have Hans von Spakovsky to kick around anymore... Hopefully.

2008-05-18T18:38:00.000-07:00

Well, now that everyone's favorite vote-suppressing strudel lover has withdrawn his chubby little spanner from the works of the FEC we can get something going here. Hopefully Congress can get the remaining seats filled with people who are only 45%-55% sycophant and look into something. You know, if they aren't too busy.

Cocoa Puffs!?

2008-05-10T16:44:00.000-07:00

If the third front in the GWOT heats up, money for school will no longer be a problem. I'll make more than enough fiat dollars in hostile fire pay to cover the current G.I. Bill shortcomings. But on the bright side, I may get another chance to visit my bedouin son Rat-Man. I miss him and his panty-melting green neckerchief, and the Kimbo style beat downs he would handout to all who would dare to eyeball his cocoa puffs. Just Rat-Man, Me and our trusty M-4 carbine. Mission Accomplished.

Let me just say this first, I do believe that drunk driving is a very dangerous and stupid thing to do and shouldn't be punished with just a slap on the wrist, but this is ridiculous. Having said that, I find that the constant pounding our bill of rights takes in the name of safety, is a lot more dangerous to our society as a whole than some drunkard out cruising. Never mind the fact that those who lobby for, or in some cases write these fascist friendly laws usually make a tidy ~~little~~ profit from their benevolence.

I just want to thank the Concrete Ghost for letting me ~~shit~~ post on his electronic front yard, and to my buddy Joe B, I'm glad you're almost back from Iraq. And to Mondo, who as my attorney, advises me to " DRINK SUM BEERZZ" You need to hit up Amsterdam before you cross the pond. P.S. hey concrete ghost, I thought you'd enjoy this bit of undernews .

Awesomeness!!! Animal Awesomeness!!!

2008-04-22T17:44:00.000-07:00

Okay, I was hipped to this new Animal Collective video by Mallory Jr., and it's full of Animal Awesomeness. It's a live performance of a new song called, "Brother Sport." It's got the hypnotic rhythms that AC have made a staple of their jams, stoned-monk harmonic chanting, with some good bleeps and bloops all simmering in the crock pot with a tasty bay leaf, and more than a pinch of Avey Tare screaming into the mic. What else could you want? You better say nothing.

If you like it leave some comments! If you don't like it leave some comments! My blog get's lonely without any commments! And the person who keeps posting as anonymous saying my blogs are bloggy isn't going to get any dinner tonight if she doesn't make a user name...

Songs of the As-Yet-To-Be-Determined-Time-Period!

2008-04-21T19:29:00.000-07:00

I have been meaning to sign up for some dumb file hosting website for awhile now, but never really got around to it until now, which is why I am making this post. I wanted to be cool like all my blogger heroes (Here's lookin' at you, Perez!) and put up some illegal music. No Lou, not music made by THE illegals, songs that I am distributing without owning the copyright. Although, I am encouraging people who like these jams to go and buy them at their local independent record store. Wow, that totally makes me sound like a prick!!

First up, I Should Have Known Better by She & Him. I know, I know. "What a douche," you say, "starting with a Beatles cover." Whatevs, I'm not sweating it. She is Zooey Deschanel and He is M. Ward.

Next we have For Reverend Green by Animal Collective. Probably everyone has already heard of them and thinks I am just trying to compensate for the first song being a Beatles cover (Douche!) and also an actor/actress band. I guess it's better you think that than think it's to compensate for my tiny penis.

Last Jam of the As-Yet-To-Be-Determined-Time-Period is Pu$$y by Bangers & Cash. Again, this song is already kinda old, but when I checked my iTunes this album had the most plays, which is kinda weird (but not really because I did listen the shit out of it). Plus, I get to show I am hip and with it and all that. I picked this song because it features the line, "Sittin' home poppin' boners to That's So Raven" which is probably the funniest thing I've ever heard. Funniest and most true.

Lou Dobbs is the only thing I seem to care about...

2008-03-31T21:57:00.001-07:00

Okay, so maybe my blog will only be about Lou Dobbs from now on. Maybe I'm too excitable. Maybe I am overreacting. Maybe I need another cup of some guilt-free frozen yogurt and to just chill the fuck out. Or maybe it's not me, it's you, Lou.

Exhibit B <--- Make a clicking thing here!

I'm not really sure where to start on this one, (Oh yes I am...) but it might be with good old Lou calling the US and A the most progressive country on the earth. Okay, no it's really with him referring to Condi Rice and although not by name but certainly through implication, my main man Barry Obama, with the adjective "cotton-pickin'" in his mini-rant about how he can't call them coloreds anymore without someone getting on his extremely old case. He does catch himself just before he ads the hyphen and pickin', but you know it's there, I know it's there, and the citizens of the most progressive nation on Allah's green Earth know it's there. It's bubbling just below that vascular, wrinkled old skull-front that is Lou Dobbs' forehead (and his great-grandchildrens' favorite place to wipe their boogers).

On a related note, can we change the constitution to prohibit anyone old enough to refer to "dinner" as "supper" is too old to be president?

For anyone who likes Lou Dobbs...

2008-03-26T08:01:00.000-07:00

What can I say? You are a fucking moron...

Repeat:

YOU ARE A FUCKING MORON!

WeirdBeard!!

2008-03-05T19:36:00.000-08:00

Oh man, I totally am making a blog post to get WeirdBeard's attention! Is he gonna read it? Shit! Just so he doesn't think I am shitty at typing, let the record show that WeirdBeard is intentionally one word with two capital letters. Think MasterCard. It's very powerful.

Hmm... now I gotta figure out what he would want to read about. I could make this the first post of my long awaited daily stool thread, in which I detail my daily b.m. and take reader suggestions for undigestibles for consumptus quod exhaustus?

Naw, I need to get a new digital camera first. 7.1 megapixels is just not quite enough to capture the turdery that I am perpetrating.

How about a work rant?

So a guy applies for a loan yesterday to refinance his current auto loan with another credit union. He gets approved, so I send him the form he needs to fill out with all the information for his current finance company and a list of things he needs to send to me. He doesn't have an account with us so I have to get a lot of basic stuff like drivers license and social security card and utility bill to check his address, plus he has to send in proof of income and a copy of his registration and proof of insurance.

I get an e-mail from him this morning and it's like he scanned a shitty fax and sent it as a .pdf file. Half of the stuff was completely illegible, and some of what was looked a little fake. Fake like he didn't even spell the name right on some of the stuff. Fake like the lines of text on his "paycheck stub" didn't match up in places.

He calls in later to see if I got his stuff, but at this point I haven't actually unwrapped the little gift he's sent me so I tell him I'll open it up and take a look. Seeing the interesting documents, I asked him why it looked like that. He proceed to spin me a yarn about how he had one fax machine, but it would only fax to 800 numbers and our number is 415, so he faxed them to himself at another "office" so he could scan them and e-mail them to me from there.

Why wouldn't he just bring the originals, which he claimed to have with him, and scan and e-mail them to me there? He said he didn't know. I told him to go get the stuff and then come back and scan it for me. He said he couldn't do that because he is traveling right now and and going to different offices everyday. I asked him if he could bring them to a Kinko's and have them do it for him. I guess he couldn't do that that because after work he just has to drive right away to the next job. It sure sounds like he doesn't even sleep, just work and drive. Then he said he has another copy that was better he could e-mail me, why he wouldn't send me the better copy in the first place is anyone's guess. Not impressed. At least change the file name if you are going to pretend it's a different scan, guy.

Just a fun sample of my day...

Earlier when he was talking about his many travels he mentioned he would be back in the suburb of SF that he lives in, so I told him if it was a big problem he could bring all his stuff in when he gets back. He was very

Find out if your friends and neighbors are who they really claim to be...

2008-02-15T23:10:00.000-08:00

Hucklebee! Fuckabee! Huck-A-Mania?

2008-01-04T23:35:00.000-08:00

And if it is Huck-A-Mania, what are you going to do when it comes for you? Why is he such a jerk? Is it his idiotic support of the fair tax? Is it his covering up of his son's dog killing follies? Is it the hideous picture you see above? Well, there may be another cause to add to the ever swelling litany of reasons that is our dear Hucklebee is a pair of dirty sweatpants peed on by a convicted felon.

My friend Ricardo said that supposedly Hucklebee lied when he said he lost all that baby fat from just eating right and exercising, and that he really had help from a little friend called gastric bypass surgery.Ricardo read it on this one website, but he is pretty reliable and he is finally getting sick of Ron Paul, so I feel I can trust his judgment more now. Also, he has a lot of time to look at shit on the internet.

Supposedly, right before Huckster lost all his weight he went on a vacation and wouldn't tell any of his staff where he was going. He was gone long enough to have had the surgery and recovered, and he had already started his weight-loss by the time he returned to work. This may or may not be true, but no one reads this and if I'm not posting whatever wacky shit I hear I'll never be like my hero Matt Drudge.

"I Don't Heart Hucklebee" - Sabrina

2008-01-01T00:36:00.001-08:00

ZOMG that's hilarious!

Jonathan Richman at Great American Music Hall

2007-12-11T21:18:00.000-08:00

So Sabrina was complaining that I hadn't posted anything on my blog, even though no one (including her) really reads this sum'bitch. Then she saw me getting the picture of Jonathan for my post about the concert and totally made an "I'm disgusted about this" sound. I asked her what she wanted me to write about, and she said I should write about the plants we want to get for our apartment. She was also helpful enough to suggest I mention the "stupid plant" that I want to get.

I'm pretty sure she was talking about the bonsai tree I was planning on getting. It's not one of the classic bonsai trees, it's one where is has the little leaves that make it look even more like a freaky shrunk normal tree.

Sabrina told me the reason she hates bonsai trees is because they usually have crooked trunks. What is up with that? Then she said we could get a miniature version of the indoor tree she wants, but that's up to her to buy.

Like most people, when I initially thought about pissing in the pool that is the "Blogosphere" my head was filled with visions of pay-per-click ads, pudding, and large checks made out to CASH. But of the posts I have so far, the first one was the most popular based on the number of comments it received. And all it said was:

9.22.2007

Holy fuck man

Oh shit!

Posted by Graham at 01:09

Is this the kind of stunt that a Matt Drudge, an Arianna Huffington, even a Mahmoud Ahmadinejad would employ? I think Mahmoud's first post was a light-hearted retelling of his vaguely Obamaesque rise from rags to riches. Mine definitely pales in comparison, but I want to know what he was doing up at 04:12 working on his blog?

I have abandoned all hope for monetary gain from this blog, unless I can develop some kind of dick pills to sell to, well, I guess myself because as I mentioned earlier no one reads this.

Walkmen at the Independent last night.

2007-11-14T22:03:00.001-08:00

I saw the Walkmen at the Independent last night and they were really good. I think this was the fifth time I've seen them and I was looking forward to seeing them play some new jams. They played five or six new songs, and most of them were really good. My favorite was one called something like "It'll Be A New Year." It had a really good hook and an interesting arrangement. I think that most of the new songs held up well next to the older songs they played. If my I remember correctly those were Hang on Siobhan, Louisiana, Good For You's Good For Me, Revenge Wears No Wristwatch, Thinking Of A Dream I Had, and Wake up during the encore. Hopefully the new songs will be on the new album they are working on for 2008.

Check out their Website.

Come on Democrats!

2007-11-13T18:45:00.000-08:00

What the hell man? Why are they punking out on closing the carried income tax loophole? Don't they know I'm loco? Full Story

‘We’ve Treated The Arab World As A Collection Of Big Gas Stations’ - Gen. John Abizaid (Ret.)

2007-10-15T18:29:00.000-07:00

Quite a quote from Abizaid, who went on to say about the Iraq war, “Of course it’s about oil, we can’t really deny that.” You may remember him as former CENTCOM commander, or perhaps from his role as Chupe on the popular telenovela Quien es Tarde a la Pachanga de mi Abuelita?" Full Story

Pontiff's Pussy Pens Page-Turner!

2007-10-03T17:26:00.001-07:00

Finally the children of the world will hear the truth about everyone's favorite goose-stepping Pontiff, and all from from the creature who knows him best. Purporting to be BFF with Eggs Benedict XVI himself, Chico the cat spins quite a yarn with this book, then his editor hold it up for him to bat at. Full Story

Holy fuck man

2007-09-22T01:09:00.001-07:00

Oh shit!